Burmese Days - Hpa-an

Mawlamyine - Hpa-an Day 10

The Belgians went out to see the pagoda on top of the hill in the morning and something else (these guys never stopped), while Bob and me made the most of our comfortable room by doing precisely nothing, except for a bit of internetting. We planned to meet up and get a taxi to the bus station about 12:30, beside the bus station was a  hotel with a swimming pool, which we were looking forward to, havent seen a swimming pool since Bangkok! It never quite worked out this way, as there was some confusion with the taxi driver who dropped us at a closer place to get the bus, so we ended up straight on the bus and on the way to Hpa-an. It was a chankmobile, and Bob ended up sitting sideways to give his massive pins some room. I was at the window, so I could open it right up and get some cool-down. Unfortunately I couldnt keep my eyes open and there was no position to sleep in. I was afraid I would fall out the window if I passed out so I ended up doing the bobble-head the whole journey. I tried closing the window so I could sleep against it but it was too bouncy and I was denying at least 10 people cool air by closing it so I gave up on that. The bus journey was less than two hours though so I didnt have to endure this weird sleep deprivation torture for long.
First impressions of Hpa-an for me was its pretty scabby looking. Kinpun was very villagey and basic, but had a certain charm. This was more like a town, all concrete and mildew. The attraction of Hpa-an is what is to be found in the surrounding lush countryside and limestone mountains. Our room in the Soe brothers guesthouse was another super basic room. No air-con and very very small. As Bob said, "we're slumming it again". However, the place was pretty clean. We booked a room here because the Lonely Bible said it was the only place in town where the staff (or the Soe Brothers at least) could speak English, and would provide hand-drawn maps and guides or motorbikes for the surrounding areas. The Belgians had not booked a room in advance, and they were told the inn was full upon arrival. They went off in search of alternative accomodation. They ended up landing on their feet, with a room with working aircon and a communal balcony that had an excellent view of the river and bizzarely shaped mountains across the water. The Belgian met a Frenchman who described one of them as "little titty", and he was right. It's the closest you get to seeing any flesh in Burma!
Bob and me went for a wander that evening to scope the town out. The power cuts here are the worst we have encountered in Burma so far. The entire town goes dark in the blink of an eye, then a couple of beacons (police station, restaurants) light up eventually as their generators kick in. We went to one restaurant that the Bible sort of recommended and had a bite. Ive found that Squid is the only dependable seafood out here. I know its not fresh, but not fresh squid is better than not fresh shrimps and the like. Across the street was the only bar in town, but it was pretty bogging (one of the worst toilets Ive seen too), and when we actually went in for a beer Bob's throat started to sting from the petrol fumes from the generator, so we made a hasty retreat. We walked through the treacherously paved, pitch black streets using headtorches to reach another recommended restaurant on the edge of town where we had some beers and I did some diary. This restaurant looked better, a massive plate of garnish was put out and no fewer than 10 covered dishes of various dips and miscellaneous looking stuff. This was all complementary if you bought food. They had a generator in here but that gave out briefly at one point too and we found ourselves in the pitch black once again.
The walk home was surreal. the streets were dead and black, the only things you could see was the reflected lights of the streets dogs eyes watching you from the end of the road and the alleyways. We stopped of again at the first restaurant for a nightcap and a bite to eat. We chose a Fried Assorted Mix, which included everything Chicken, Eel, Squid, Prawn and I hate to think what else. It looked a Bob dream meal and a Scott nightmare meal. I picked at it a bit, but would come to regret it..
We got home to relatively hot room, but to our surprise the fan was working. It gave up the ghost at about 11pm, though, so it was another relatively sweaty night.

Hpa-an Day 11

I woke up the next morning with stomach pains and nausea. The runs had finally caught me. I popped an Imodium (my new favourite drug), but this time it was to prove ineffective. Whatever was in there, my body wanted it out. We rushed out that morning because we woke late and on to the waiting motorbikes with no breakfast and little to drink. We picked up a packet of Garibaldi type biscuits on the way to keep me and Bob going until lunch. I managed to forget about my stomach which seemed to have settled. We set off on our tour, with the Belgians, to see the sights dotted around Hpa-an. Bob once again got off to a false start with a flat front tyre, so we returned to base, and to Bobs delight he got a new-ish Chinese 110cc bike with much better suspension than we had encountered so far! So with Bob feeling like Denis Hopper, we tried again.
First stop was a cave "Kaw gon", or something like that, with loads of Buddha statues and tiny little buddhas carved into the rock in impossible places. More of a cavern actually. Mining in the area with dynamite had brought some of the cave crashing down, so it was past its original glory. We only stopped here for a bit and the old stomach gave me some gip.

Back on the road, and we stopped at another cave, a whole different kettle of fish. We climbed the steps to the entrance, to find a monk watching music videos on a notebook and smoking a fag. The view from the top was lovely.

 He pointed the way in, and we took off our shoes and ventured into the gloom. There were small lights scattered here and there, which although not enough to light the way, helped a little. Headtorches a must. This cave had Buddhas at the entrance, but once inside, it was undecorated. There were stalactites and those big kind of drippy formations you find on the walls of caves. Barefoot we felt our way through, and it was hot hot in there.

Weird glowing...leafage

 We emerged on the other side about 10 mins later to a great view across the countryside, all of us sweating like horses and a little surprised at the unexpected journey we had found ourselves on. We started back and lo and behold, the power went out. There was a bunch of screaming and laughing kids in front of us too, so we fumbled through the dark with their noise ringing in our ears, another surreal journey. By the time we got out, dripping with sweat, I was starting to feel worse. I felt weak and clumsy. Perhaps too much without a decent breakfast.

We set off towards the next stop, a big pillar of rock in the middle of a lake with a pagoda on it. We sat down for a cool drink when we got there and my stomach started to twist up again andI began to feel very tired. The others set off for the pillar of rock, and I lay down on a bench.

Er...me on a bench

 The pillar of rocks name sounds almost exactly like the French pronounciation of "Chocolat", which the Belgians were very pleased about!

They returned and woke me up, having climbed halfway up the rock for a view.

...the view

...and from the other side

We set off again after watching a pickup truck load an insane amount of kids on to the back of it, towards our lunch stop, a kind of holiday destination for the Burmese apparently, which also had an outdoor swimming bit.

 The setting was dramatic, with a big cliff right behind the swimming area. By the time we arrived I felt like shit.  I began to worry at this point I may not be able to make it home on the bike. All sorts of alternatives were running through my head. I ate a mouthful of fried rice (the thought of grease at the time of writing is still making my stomach turn) and once again lay down in the shade on the ground to try and get some sleep, the only thing my body seemed to want. The others ate their fill and went for a swim in the "pool", Chloe wearing a tshirt and full longhyi, visible flesh not being an option here.
They woke me up again and I felt a little better. I said I was going straight home though, and Bob said he would come with. The Belgians wanted to stop off at the gardens at the foot of the mountain we were due to climb tomorrow. It was a nice ride home, more stop-start than yesterday; you could open the bike up, only to have to brake hard as a big pothole opened up in front of you, or the very real danger of hitting cow, chicken, goat or even wild pig.
We got back to the guesthouse and my mood brightened knowing I was home and could just lie down. I could feel my whole body rejoicing as I hit the bed. I went to bed at 7pm, and despite waking a couple of times here and there, slept until midday the next day. Something I haven't done for a long long time!
During this time, Bob went out for dinner, booked a flight to Kuala Lumpur from Yangon, booked accommodation in Kuala Lumpur, got informed about the buses to Yangon, and made it up a mountain. Nice one bruv :)

Hpa-an - Day 12: Last Day

As mentioned, I spent the first half of the day in bed. Bob was off at 8am with the Belgians on bike to scale the mountain and see a massive cave. He said the mountain was the hardest climb he had ever done. I got up and went to a wee place for breakfast. I don't think I will be able to stomach fried food for a while. This may prove to be problematic, we are in SE Asia after all..

various pics from Bob as he scaled the mountain..

At the top...last adventure in Burma.